Aspie with Attitude

Sure, I'm just another Southern Recovering Alcoholic NPR- and Sweet-Tea Addicted Comic Mom with Asperger's in the SFV, but I can tell you now that I don't necessarily fit the stereotype.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Is God Really in Control of This?!?

First, let me say that I do consider myself a Christian, although not a very good one. I believe it's dangerous, however, to attribute things to God's will when I am probably not wise enough to know what is in God's will and what isn't. Having said that, I contemplate my own life quite often and sometimes, in hindsight, I try to figure out what was God's will. But I do that in my own life, not in the lives of others, especially not babies. Nonetheless, there is a group of religious folk that, despite their protests, profit quite nicely from adoption. They are a bit more modest, of course, at least when it comes to adoption:

Obviously we are not in control of this process---God is! When you try to rush things and get a baby in your time instead of His timing then things never work out. God is COMPLETELY SOVEREIGN and He has been and will work in your lives for your good and His glory. If you try to put the puzzle together yourself you will miss the work that He is doing in your heart and life.

and then there's this lovely passage:

But in the end when you place yourself in the center of God's will for growing your family, then it is time to sit back and enjoy the ride. If it takes one month or one year for that child to find his/her way into your family realize and accept that God's timing is perfect! Don't try to worry about tomorrow or be envious of those around you who have what you want. Place your trust in God who already has your future planned out. He knows the desires of your heart to be a parent to a child through adoption.

Funny how the adopters are not supposed to "be envious," but if they really weren't envious, they'd be helping a mom to keep her baby, don't ya think?!?

And I really super duper love the way these supposed Christians act as though they're not making money on adoption transactions. How much does God will, I wonder, for the adopters to pay the agency for their "gift," i.e. infant? See what happens when you try to figure out what's God's will as you play some kind of strange chess game with infants and their natural families? See how it seem as though God has a big chessboard and is moving around children like pawns. Attempting to save some supposed queen perhaps?!?

Someone passed along this Web site on Facebook and I really appreciate it. Adoption propaganda such as this used to really bother me, but it doesn't so much anymore. I do marvel, however, at how far some Christians have come in swallowing the adoption lies that a greedy industry has been perpetuating for years. It's a real shame, isn't it?!? Even though this "Christian" agency's social workers are matchmakers for adopters and children taken from the natural mothers that God gave them, it is God, of course, who's in control. So, God is not only taking away a child from his or her mother, the only mother who can custom make milk for the baby that has grown inside her, but God is also, if these folks are to be believed, responsible for finding the right strangers to take this child from the mother. I don't remember reading about such a God-oriented ritual in the New Testament. Even the Old Testament's story of Moses illustrates that in the end, the child goes with his or her natural family. At least that's how I'd interpret that story. But the adoption industry, a $1.6 billion dollar biz in the U.S., has laid claim to Moses as well, passing him off as the world's first Biblically-sanctioned adoptee or some such.

Anyway, I'm having an especially difficult time with Christians who think that it's okay to break apart natural God-created families to fulfill some kind of strange Orwellian scheme. I'm sure that the Christians, if they read this blog, would think that I'm crazy for suggesting such things. But those of us who have thought deeply and circumspectly about adoption would think I am more or less sane.



7 comments:

Jim Wetzel said...

"I believe it's dangerous, however, to attribute things to God's will when I am probably not wise enough to know what is in God's will and what isn't."

There's not that many things I'll claim to be sure of, but that's one: that I'm not wise enough to know the will of God. And I'm almost as sure that no one else is, either.

I do think, though, that there's a reliable, though indirect and slow, way of getting a good-enough idea of God's will for oneself. Micah 6:8 says: He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God. I think that if a person lives that way, God can manage to let him or her know, over time, what in particular it is that they should do.

Excellent point about the co-option of Moses, too. I'll grant the industry that the first time I find an infant member of a persecuted minority floating unattended in a basket in a river, I can feel free to take custody of that child. Otherwise, it probably doesn't apply.

Fine post!

(Small note in passing: the link in the next-to-last paragraph is empty.)

Crunchy said...

I no longer consider myself a christian for the very things you write about. I lost my children to adoption though I was never actually accused of doing anything to harm them. The people who adopted my youngest gush about how "God" gave her to them. I can't help thinking God gave her to ME, the *state* gave her to them. If God meant her to be theirs, the woman who calls herself my child's mother would have been the one pregnant with her. I refuse to believe an all-powerful God would make the mistake of putting a child in the wrong woman's womb so frequently.

Jennifer said...

I love what you wrote and you are correct. Adoption is man's will if it were God's will then that would be taking away man's free will. God doesn't make mistakes men do, to use the name of God in Adoptions or to justify adoptions is wrong and I pray God deal with all the people who believe this lie

Jennifer said...

I love what you wrote and you are correct. Adoption is man's will if it were God's will then that would be taking away man's free will. God doesn't make mistakes men do, to use the name of God in Adoptions or to justify adoptions is wrong and I pray God deal with all the people who believe this lie

Jennifer said...

I love what you wrote and you are correct. Adoption is man's will if it were God's will then that would be taking away man's free will. God doesn't make mistakes men do, to use the name of God in Adoptions or to justify adoptions is wrong and I pray God deal with all the people who believe this lie

summerhill said...

All of this (above post and comments) is true, but I do think the incoming spirit of the child knows what is (or is likely to) happen, and knows that adoption is one possible path for its life. I do think there is a spiritual aspect / guidance of sorts in what parents (and children) we uget, and that nothing is really a mistake or 'accident'.

Biologically it is most important for a baby to be with its mother or at least to be told the truth of their origin and know their natural family (I am an adoptee). But spirits have paths of growth, and sometimes pain and loss is a great teacher.

WWJD?

No doubt provide support to the triad (b-mother, b-father and baby) so they can stay together and not separate the child.

I think the wanton use of adoption in white-culture usa is very wrong to infants, but it is also the case that what brings people together in life is also often part of a spiritual plan (for 'good' or 'ill', but always ultimately for our growth, evolution, and return to love).

Stacy said...

Adoption is a response to a fallen world. Without sin, every child would be able to stay with their natural families. However that is not always possible. I believe Gods role is what the Bible says inpsalm 68:6. God sets the lonely in families. Would you rather a child languish in an orphanage because that way they are staying in their culture right? Every child deserves love and security.

One more thing. I don't PRETEND God is my Father. He is. He loves me the same as Christ because I am adopted. Grafted in.

I am sorry you are so hurt and jaded by your own adoption experience. Really I am. Just because that was your experience doesn't mean its every adoptees.