Aspie with Attitude

Sure, I'm just another Southern Recovering Alcoholic NPR- and Sweet-Tea Addicted Comic Mom with Asperger's in the SFV, but I can tell you now that I don't necessarily fit the stereotype.

Monday, March 10, 2008

The Problem With The Public Schools

You can't please everyone. -Brian, Monty Python's Life of Brian

But of course, the government schools really try, don't they? This latest move, in Minnesota, banned, yes banned, smells from government schools. I'm a pretty smell-oriented person, being accused often, as I am, of smelling like patchouli. In fact, I heard once a smell expert, and evidently those guys exist, who said that one reason there is so much divorce is because we have disconnected ourselves from smells. Whereas our ancestors would have been attracted to, or repulsed by, certain people's smells, people cover their smells so much these days that it's hard to know whom you're supposed to be with. Smell is one of those things that we hardly notice sometimes, and yet, it's from our reptilian brain, a very early and important sense. I also heard, from the same smell expert, that if a mother and child spend five minutes together after birth, they will remember each other's smell for the rest of their lives. That's why my mother's smell was so very familiar when I found her; and it's probably why no matter how much I loved the people I grew up with, their smell never seemed quite right to me.

In Minnesota, the government is trying to eradicate people's smells. You may think, after reading the previous paragraph, that I'm all for a law that would try to make people revert to their natural smells, but I'm not. In fact, I'm not for many laws at all, but especially those that try to regulate such a personal thing as smell. If you want to smell like a gay guy from the eighties, I say go for it! Nay, nay, saith the Minnesota schools:

A Minnesota lawmaker proposed a bill Monday urging a fragrance-free educational campaign to discourage students from dousing themselves in scents that aggravate classmates with asthma and other health problems.

As Jeff Foxworthy would say, "If I'm lyin', I'm dyin'" It could have been worse:

Rep. Karen Clark, a Democrat, first proposed banning fragrances in Minneapolis schools, one of the state's largest school districts. The bill she introduced Monday scales that back to an awareness campaign in Minneapolis and in other districts that volunteer. The campaign could include letters to parents, fact sheets, signs in schools, e-mail and Web sites.

Read the whole story for yourself
and you'll see why I distrust most elected officials.

Oh, and I have a better idea than banning scents in the public schools; let's ban the public schools!

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